Have you ever wondered why that one person from your school or college who always scored the highest marks, had the highest IQ failed to live up to the expectations the world had from him?
Why that, seemingly not-so-smart, the guy who always scored the least marks, is now successful and is at a high position in a reputable company?
What happened, what bridged the gap between the person with a higher IQ and the person with a lower one?
For decades, researchers were carried out for the same, and people discovered that there is indeed something that trumped IQ and is responsible for the success that the people achieve in their lives.
This something came to be known as ‘Emotional Quotient’ or ‘Emotional Intelligence’. The research showcased that EQ is not a mere secret ingredient for success but most of the times it acted as the whole recipe as almost 90% of top performers in their respective fields had been recorded to have high emotional intelligence.
People with higher EQ were found to be happier, successful, satisfied in comparison to people who didn’t have it.
Now, one might wonder what exactly Emotional Intelligence is.
Well, Emotional intelligence is the ability of individual to understand their own and other’s emotions, the ability to define, differentiate, use emotional information to guide thinking and behavior, and manage and/or adjust emotions to adapt to environments or achieve one’s goal(s).
But the concept of EQ transcends far beyond this textbook definition and its intangible nature makes it difficult to measure and to understand what is it that you are actually lacking? So how to identify if you have high EQ or not:
You know your emotions
There is one thing to experience emotions, which every one of us does; but to identify what emotion one is going through is an entirely different thing. I have seen people saying most of the time that they don’t understand how they are feeling. But people with higher EQs master because they understand them, and they use an extensive vocabulary of feelings to do so.
While most people will say they are having a ‘bad’ day and they don’t know why, emotionally intelligent people will know if they are ‘irritated’, ‘frustrated’, downtrodden’ or ‘anxious’. It’s easier to overcome your emotions if at first, you understand what exactly you are feeling.
You are a butterfly and not a caterpillar:
Emotionally Intelligent people always embrace change. They are flexible and adaptable. They often look at change as an opportunity to grow rather than looking at it as an instrument of fear. They know that while it’s easier to be a caterpillar and the process of being a butterfly might be painful, the caterpillar will never be able to fly.
You know when to let go:
Things will eventually go wrong in your life at one moment or the other. You will face failures in personal as well as professional life. Some people don’t even try due to the fear of failure, some people hold onto the despair of making a mistake all their life. Both of these people are not emotionally intelligent people.
People with high EQs are not afraid of making mistakes. And when they do make them, they always learn from them and let go of the pain associated with them. The key to balance lies in your ability to transform failures into nuggets of improvement. This creates the tendency to get right back up every time you fall down.
You seek purpose rather than passion
We’ve heard the advice, “just follow your passion” again and again as a cure to life’s problems. It never felt right, but we could not figure out why. Passion often would be the fuel to launch new endeavors, but not enough to sustain them. If passion is driven by energy and emotion, the purpose is driven by reason.
Ultimately, the latter is more likely to make us successful than the former. Emotionally Intelligent people understand that while passion is required to start the engine, ultimately purpose needs to get the car moving ahead.
So now let me ask you a question. Do you think you are intelligent?
Also Read: Hardwork- Not the key to success